Freeheld – Love is Love

Tags

365Gay.com, Academy Award for Best Documentary Short Subject, cancer, civil rights, Cynthia Wade, Dane Wells, Ellen Page, Freeheld, Garden State Equality, gay, Hans Zimmer, happy new year, homophobia, John P. Kelly, Julianne Moore, laurel hester, lesbian, Love is Love, Maryse Alberti, Matthew Syrett, Michael Shannon, NJ, Ocean County, Peter Sollett, Policemen's Benefit Association, queer, Rob Schwimmer, Ron Nyswaner, Stace Leigh Andree, Stage 4 cancer, stage 4 lung cancer, Steve Carell, Steven Goldstein, Vanessa Roth

 

Here’s the skinny on Laurel Hester. She was a 23-year veteran of the Ocean County prosecutor’s office, where she worked on a variety of cases, when she was discovered she had stage 4 lung cancer (Stage four (IV) means the lung cancer has spread to more than one area in the other lung, the fluid surrounding the lung or the heart, or distant parts of the body through the bloodstream. Once released in the blood, cancer can spread anywhere in the body, but it is more likely to spread to the brain, bones, liver, and adrenal glands.). She was one of the first women to achieve rank of Lieutenant in her department and was greatly respected by her fellow officers.

While in Ocean County, where she earned the rank of lieutenant, she
worked behind the scenes on a number of high-profile cases, devoting
most of her career to organized-crime intelligence. She helped develop
information that investigators in New York would later use for
successful prosecutions of mob figures there.

She met her girlfriend in the early 2000s, Stacie Leigh Andree (born 1975) who was 19 years younger than Hester and worked as a car mechanic.

The cancer then metastasized and spread to her brain, leaving her with little time to live. Laurel lived with and jointly owned a house with her registered domestic partner, Stacie Andree, who would not be able to afford mortgage payments upon Laurel’s death. A married heterosexual with Hester’s years of police service would be able to pass on pension benefits to a spouse, but this privilege was not accorded to same-sex domestic partners in Ocean County, NJ.

Hester and Garden State Equality Founder and Chair Emeritus, Steven Goldstein appealed to local authorities to change this policy, and was supported by the local Policemen’s Benefit Association. Instead, in a private meeting on November 9, 2005, the five Republican county freeholders voted against the proposal, with freeholder John P. Kelly arguing that it threatened “the sanctity of marriage.” On November 23, a rally of supporters rallied by Steven Goldstein gathered to protest the county’s inaction.

On January 18, 2006, an impassioned videotaped appeal by a weakening Hester from her hospital bed was shown at a meeting of the freeholders, who then met with county Republican leaders in a teleconference on January 20. The next day, the freeholders announced that they were reversing their stance, and would meet on January 25 to extend pension benefits to registered domestic partners.

She died exactly a month later after sending the committee the video plea on February 18, 2006, in her home in Point Pleasant, New Jersey.

There is a new movie about Hester’s fight for equality coming out October 2nd starring Julianne Moore and Ellen Page, also titled Freeheld.

Love is love.

– Mushpa

Happy Labor Day

Tags

1887, alternative apparel, art, artist, beauty, Cara Reynolds, Central Labor Union, clay bead necklace, coffee cozies, DAS, Detroit, eco-friendly, eco-jewelry, EcoFi felt, etsy, Fair Labor Standards Act, fashion, felt, gay, Groover Cleaveland, handmade, Happiness, home-made, homemade, inspiration, jewlery, Knights of Labor, Labor Day, Labor Day 2015, Labor Day Women, lavender, lesbian, Maria Emilia Borja, Mensa, Michigan, Mushpa, Mushpa Y Mensa, Mushpa y Mensa Free Shipping code, necklace, NYC, organic, organic cotton tees, plush animals, plush pets, promotion code, queer, recycled, recycling plastic bottles, refurbished fabric, screen printing, stuffed aimals, t shirt designs, t-shirts, tablet case, tanks, tea cozies, tops, toys, unique, Women in Labor Day, Women workers

Happy Labor Day to all! For those who don’t know what Labor Day is all about, here is the skinny. Labor Day, the first Monday in September, is a creation of the labor movement (mostly promoted by the Central Labor Union and the Knights of Labor in NYC). Groover Cleaveland made it official in 1887. Labor Day is dedicated to the social and economic achievements of American workers. It constitutes a yearly national tribute to the contributions workers have made to the strength, prosperity, and well-being of our country.

Now on to some interesting Labor Day trivia!

• To take advantage of large numbers of potential customers free to shop, Labor Day has become an important sale weekend for many retailers in the United States. Some buyers retailers claim it is one of the largest sale dates of the year, second only to the Christmas season’s Black Friday. Ironically, because of the importance of the sale weekend, some of those who are employed in the retail sector not only work on Labor Day, but work longer hours. More Americans work in the retail industry than any other, with retail employment making up 24% of all jobs in the United States. As of 2012, only 3% of those employed in the retail sector were members of a labor union.
• Women were among the earliest factory workers in the mill and textile industries and also among the earliest to organize.
• 21.3% of women work in service occupations, some of which (domestic work, for example) are not covered by many of the employee protections we celebrate on Labor Day.  This lack of coverage dates back to 1938 when Congress passed the Fair Labor Standards Act based on a political compromise by which it excluded domestic and agricultural workers, who were primarily African-American. Today, high rates of Hispanic women work in the service sector (33.2%).
• In high society, Labor Day is (or was) considered the last day of the year when it is fashionable to wear white or seersucker.

We here at Mushpa y Mensa strive to contribute to the strength, prosperity and well being of our country, world and universe in everything we do. From the meaning we put into our art, to all the people we come in contact with at amazing events where we end up and through our online presence. We are blessed to have this job that pushes us to learn so many things from others and hopefully we give back as much to them.

Here is something tangible we can give back today, on the 2nd largest sale date of the year! ;] A free shipping promotion code MAYA007!!! This will get you out of shipping charges on any item(s) at our Etsy Shop. Exciting!!! 😀 Click below to get to our shop and check out our original designs on organic cotton tees, tanks and tops, plush pets with felt made from recycling plastic bottles and stuffed with real lavender, eco-jewelry, coffee and tea cozies made from unique, refurbished fabric amongst tons of other cool stuff. Spread the word!

We hope everyone has a chill Labor Day and you are doing whatever it is you want to do today and everyday.

– Mushpa y Mensa

Mushpa y Mensa Super Summer Update

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art, artist, beauty, Cara Reynolds, clay bead necklace, clay beads, clothes, crafts, DAS, diy, eco-friendly, etsy, fashion, felt, gay, handmade, Happiness, home-made, homemade, inspiration, jewlery, kickstarter, lesbian, love, Maria Emilia Borja, Mensa, Mushpa, Mushpa Y Mensa, necklace, organic, plush animals, queer, quote, recycled, screen printing, stuffed aimals, stuffed animal, t shirt designs, t-shirts, tablet case, toys, yarn

Hello Mushpa y Mensa Super Fans!

Yes, you see right, it’s Mushpa y Mensa’s Super Summer update, after a few months of silence. We are happy to say that in the last three months, Mushpa y Mensa have begun their “Gypsy Market Life”. Already, on this journey, we have met quite a few amazing people, like the folks at Seaglass Salvage Market, Brooklyn Arts Center, Beacon House Inn, and Satellite Lounge to name a few. We have also danced and tasted many sweet wines at the Duplin Winery’s Main Squeeze Music and Wine Festival, as well as met dozens of new, fun people at the annual Azalea and Strawberry Festivals in North Carolina. ;] We even partnered up with Wilmington’s Earth Day Alliance and enjoyed a wonderful Earth Day Celebration at Hugh MaCrae Park.

It’s been surreal so far.

It’s amazing what faith, love, encouragement, and a little help from our friends can do. In terms of our little cottage industry, we are, as you say, busting a hump. We are constantly checking ourselves on how we can make things better from our art, to our business, to our life.

We have actually just updated the “Photos of Our Peeps” page on Mushpa y Mensa’s site. We added a photo uploading tool, so you can upload pictures of you in our organic tees, wearing our amazing jewelry, hugging our lavender filled plush pets, or even just keeping your hands cool with one of our coffee cozies. :]

And in terms of our Art? Well we keep on bringing to life tons of ideas in our head. For example, we recently created 3.5 new shirt designs. A cool Octopus Olivia with an Anchor Tattoo on her forehead,as well as R6: Reduce, Reuse, Recycle, Replenish, Reflect, Reimagine inspired by Earth Day.

We also have new organic Pima cotton relaxed fit tops that are flying out of the truck. Here is an example of the Pima tops with one of our new designs, Argema Mittrei, a female moth. Lastly, we spruced up Robot Girl and added a cute heart. All these designs we print for the ladies, the gents, and of course the smallest people around.

Mushpa y Mensa have also been focusing on custom shirts that have been selling off Maya so fast we don’t even have time to list them on our Etsy shop!

Spread the art, spread the love.

A few questions answered…

Where can I find the Art Truck?

Follow us on Twitter @mushpamensa. We are constantly posting when and where we will be. There is also an events page on our site, www.mushpaymensa.com/events we keep updated, but Twitter is best for the most up to date information.

We are doing some art shows, markets and fleas, but are hunting to find good spots to park around town. We are partnering up with cool people like the folks at the Beacon House Inn on Carolina Beach and Satellite Bar and Lounge in Wilmington.

And for all the natives and people in the know, since we are new in town, feel free to hit us up at info@mushpamensa.com or our contact page with any ideas where to park, festivals to do or whether you’d like us to rock a party or event with you!

Are you going on the road anytime soon?

We want to explore the grounds of NC and the surrounding area, so we will keep the max to weekend trips. But worry not, we will definitely be making it into the mid-west and west-coast! Maybe even an occasional trip to NYC sooner than you think!

If you have any questions about anything, make sure to ask! We love to hear from you all.

Until the next super exciting Mushpa y Mensa’s and Maya, Magical Mobile Art Machine update we say good day!

With lots of love,

               Cara and Maria Emilia

                                                             a.k.a.

American Oxygen

Tags

american oxygen, borderless universe, endless love, martin luther king jr, no hate, rihana

No hate.

-Cara

Freedom of Net

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Bob Kahn, Cara Reynolds, Columbia University media law, Comcast, Communications Act of 1934, fcc, Happiness, Internet neutrality, Internet service providers, Lawrence Lessig, net equality, net neutrality, network neutrality, petition, Sign the petition, small vs big, Tim Berners-Lee, Tim Wu, Tom Wheeler, Vinton Cerf, wikipedia

I just took action to protect net neutrality. The FCC votes soon! Take action here: http://mzl.la/1K55aRm

In case you are unaware of what Net neutrality is all about read below.

Net neutrality (also network neutrality, Internet neutrality or net equality) is the principle that Internet service providers and governments should treat all data on the Internet equally, not discriminating or charging differentially by user, content, site, platform, application, type of attached equipment, or mode of communication. The term was coined by Columbia University media law professor Tim Wu in 2003 as an extension of the longstanding concept of a common carrier.

There has been extensive debate about whether net neutrality should be required by law, particularly in the United States. Debate over the issue of net neutrality predates the coining of the term. Advocates of net neutrality such as Lawrence Lessig have raised concerns about the ability of broadband providers to use their last mile infrastructure to block Internet applications and content (e.g. websites, services, and protocols), and even to block out competitors.

Neutrality proponents claim that telecom companies seek to impose a tiered service model in order to control the pipeline and thereby remove competition, create artificial scarcity, and oblige subscribers to buy their otherwise uncompetitive services. Many believe net neutrality to be primarily important as a preservation of current freedoms. Prominent supporters of net neutrality include Vinton Cerf, co-inventor of the Internet Protocol, and Tim Berners-Lee, creator of the Web.

Examples of net neutrality violations include when the internet service provider Comcast, intentionally slowed peer-to-peer communications. In 2007, one other company was using deep packet inspection to discriminate against peer-to-peer, file transfer protocol, and online games, instituting a cell-phone style billing system of overages, free-to-telecom value added services, and bundling. Critics of net neutrality argue that data discrimination is desirable for reasons like guaranteeing quality of service. Bob Kahn, co-inventor of the Internet Protocol, called the term net neutrality a slogan and opposes establishing it, but he admits that he is against the fragmentation of the net whenever this becomes excluding to other participants. On 31 January 2015, AP News reported the FCC will present the notion of applying (“with some caveats”) Title II (common carrier) of the Communications Act of 1934 to the internet in a vote expected on 26 February 2015. Adoption of this notion would reclassify internet service from one of information to one of telecommunications and, according to Tom Wheeler, chairman of the FCC, ensure net neutrality.

[Source]

We have few freedoms left and people seem to be unaware of what is happening in the background most of the time. Don’t be distracted by static while our puppet government works for large corporations instead of their constituents. They are here to listen to the majority, so say no and push for the little people of the world. We only have the power together as cheesy as it sounds it is the truth.

Much love!

– Mushpa

Becoming Friends

Tags

Bai Kamara Jr, Bai Kamara Jr Making Beggars Into Thieves, Good Day, in darkness and light, liquid happiness, Making Beggars Into Thieves, peace in music

One of my friends asked to chat me up on g-chat, so I logged on and added her today. It’s been a couple years since I’ve logged onto g-mail. I decided to check out my emails and saw an email from 2011 asking me to add BAIKAMARAJR as a friend. Obviously by now the request had expired, but I went to check it out the YouTube channel and this is what I found….greatness and beauty. This reminded me that life, God, the Universe always has my back, blessing me with what I need when I need it. Everything is bigger than what I think I see in front of me.

Life is a miracle everyday in darkness and light.

Peace,

Cara

Things to Think About

Tags

art, brainwashing, Cara Reynolds, crafts, Happiness, injustice, Maria Emilia Borja, mass media, Mushpa Y Mensa, revolt

Fight real injustice not distractions from the truth. Mass media is playing you. Think beyond the herd.

Fly.

Life outside our window in the early morning.

Everyday is Saturday in our world. :]

– Mushpa y Mensa

I Am Happy America Won Yesterday!

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A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's Court, American, art, belonging, Country, futbol, loyalty, mark twain, mark twain A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's Court, quote, Republic of Ghana, soccer, USA, World Cup, World Cup 2014

Americans are funny. I went out with Mensa and a bunch of friends yesterday to watch the World Cup in a mammoth of a sports’ bar, America was playing the Republic of Ghana. It was interesting to me how the men were all rooting for the USA. All America boys of all colors, religion and race, but the All-American girls kept saying to me they hope Ghana wins. I thought, that’s so strange. Mensa for one, growing up a few years in Ecuador, would never had said I hope Switzerland wins this last Sunday, what made her wish a country she knows nothing about, never visited, nor befriended anyone from would win over a country she is a citizen of and has lived in longer than anywhere else, including Ecuador? What is it that makes so many “liberal” ladies (and feminist men) so anti-American? It reminded me of this Mark Twain quote from his book, A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur’s Court: “My kind of loyalty was loyalty to one’s country, not to its institutions or its officeholders. The country is the real thing, the substantial thing, the eternal thing; it is the thing to watch over, and care for, and be loyal to; institutions are extraneous, they are its mere clothing, and clothing can wear out, become ragged, cease to be comfortable, cease to protect the body from winter, disease, and death.”

Our government and corporations in America are in a horrible state of affairs for the time being; it is very true that something needs to be done about that, but that has nothing to do with soccer. Our soccer players are not billionaire baseball, football or basketball stars making a fafillion dollars off of corporate money (Only 4 US Major League Soccer players make over a million dollars. The league’s average base salary is $186,258, while the league minimum is $36,500. The minimum salary of a Major League Baseball player is $500,000 while the average salary in 2013 was $3.3 million.). They are Americans, representing us, the people, not the institutions or politicians of this country, so let it go and like every other countryperson let’s root for our team. Trust me, they need all the help they can get. ;]

Go USA!

– Mushpa

————————————————————

Mensa Responds:

I struggled with the idea of belonging, like many people do. I belonged to one country when I was born, when I grew up, and then I moved, and didn’t belong anymore. I moved here, and that’s where I finished growing up, but I didn’t fully belong, I just got used to it. And here is where I find myself, not truly belonging anywhere, yet struggling to find where I fit. And I’ve done this, and had this conversation with many people, discovered different ways of aligning myself with people who struggled with the same issue, finding niches but then getting knocked out of them because, there again, I found something that wasn’t quite right. The loyalty I have to the country I was born in, I find that it might be only there because my family is still there, maybe. I don’t think that I would be as loyal, as connected if everyone lived here. I am loyal to my childhood, because that’s what I experienced there, and my childhood was pure, and simple. I am loyal to those memories. I always hated growing up, dreaded the idea of growing up, and I did that here, in this country, in a very different place. A place with many virtues, but also many flaws. But I grew up, and I learned and struggled to cope with those flaws, focusing more on them rather than seeing the virtues and privileges I was given by this land. Now that feeling still lingers. After being here longer than anywhere else, I still haven’t let myself fully belong. Because it’s political, it’s social, it’s controversial, it’s trendy, it is what progressive thinkers do. But it is not progress. Hate, criticism, protests, it is not progress. Hate speech, controversial conversations, protest songs, and open discourses, all done in closed minded environments, are not progress, they are words. Words have been powerful over the centuries, but it is also what has enslaved us, as we have taken words to be truth rather than, just thoughts, which derive from experiences, which are just a direct reflection of our actions.

I don’t know if any of this is making sense now, but I struggled rooting for the team yesterday. I knew I fucked up saying I was rooting for the other team, it was not right, it was not my land, not my country. And I tried to get excited and stay in the game, with my now land’s team, but something felt off. Something didn’t fit. All that hate speech, those controversial conversations, those protests songs, and discussions, have tainted the soul of this land, and my own soul, as if someone other than human beings live here. It’s so tainted, its so ingrained in my brain, that I could not root for my own team, a team made up of MANY different people, all who once and maybe still didn’t feel like they belonged. I felt uncomfortable celebrating this success. But the truth of the matter is that yes, the tainted words from the criticism of the institutions have mangled the spirit of loyalty and solidarity of all people, all human people in this land. The truth is that not only are these institutions, the ones we normally think of, media, religion, or institutions of racial-gender-and socio-economic inequalities, so prominent. Something else has brewed up.  Something much uglier and complicated, that has lead us to believe that we are having conversations about progress, when we are only alienating each other more and more to the point where no one truly belongs, anywhere. I should not feel like this. It is not fair.

Yet I am guilty. I struggle to be loyal to the rest of the souls of this world.

 I will have to fix this.

-Mensa

God Hates Shrimp

Tags

Cara Reynolds, gay, Happiness, lesbian, love, Maria Emilia Borja, Mushpa Y Mensa, queer, religious

In the bible, “shrimp” are referred to as an “abomination” four times more than “homosexuality”.

God Hates Shrimp says it best…

Shrimp, crab, lobster, clams, mussels, all these are an abomination before the Lord, just as gays are an abomination. Why stop at protesting gay marriage? Bring all of God’s law unto the heathens and the sodomites. We call upon all Christians to join the crusade against Long John Silver’s and Red Lobster. Yea, even Popeye’s shall be cleansed. The name of Bubba shall be anathema. We must stop the unbelievers from destroying the sanctity of our restaurants.

Leviticus 11:9-12 says:
⁹ These shall ye eat of all that are in the waters: whatsoever hath fins and scales in the waters, in the seas, and in the rivers, them shall ye eat.
¹⁰ And all that have not fins and scales in the seas, and in the rivers, of all that move in the waters, and of any living thing which is in the waters, they shall be an abomination unto you:
¹¹ They shall be even an abomination unto you; ye shall not eat of their flesh, but ye shall have their carcases in abomination.
¹² Whatsoever hath no fins nor scales in the waters, that shall be an abomination unto you.

Deuteronomy 14:9-10 says:
⁹ These ye shall eat of all that are in the waters: all that have fins and scales shall ye eat:
¹⁰ And whatsoever hath not fins and scales ye may not eat; it is unclean unto you.

Come on people of God, all or nothing!!! Do not drink the Kool-Aid. Why are you so anti-gay and yet so pro-shellfish?

Think about it and get back to me.

– Mushpa

The Facebook Post: In Conclusion, Delete your Account.

Tags

art, Boycott Facebook, Cara Reynolds, connect with humans, eco-friendly, etsy, Facebook is evil, facebook is the new opium of the people, gay, Happiness, karl marx, karl marx opium, lesbian, Maria Emilia Borja, Mensa, Mushpa, Mushpa Y Mensa, queer, Seek Happiness, the opium of the people

I remember that I opened a Facebook account right before going to college about 8 years ago. Back then, you needed to have a college email or be “accepted” into your network, and it was just expanding to networks of cities and maybe even states. Who knows… One thing I do know. The Facebook craze has exploded in our faces in the last few years, and what used to be an exclusively elite networking computer program seems to have become the one common factor uniting the globe. From people fighting against repressive governments in Egypt, to a young kids in the rural United States, from your grandmother’s best friend, to your boss.

And now everybody is on everybody’s face.

Facebook is a ton of fun. Don’t you think?

You look through pictures of your cousin’s party and reminisce on how much fun it was, your friend posts a picture of you two when you were in diapers and the sweet nostalgia of your childhood kicks in, people share music that makes you dance, poetry that makes you cry, the hysterical “what does the fox say?” video that you cannot stop watching… It all seems fantastic. You reconnect with friends that you have lost touch with because of the years gone by, and keep the bonds strong with the people you do not get to talk to because they live in far away places. Facebook, as people say, has connected our world like never before, it has brought people together, it has created communities and it has even been a major tool in leading revolutions in countries were repressive governments have tried to silence the people. Facebook is more than a computer program… its a lifestyle that makes the world go ’round.

Ok puppies, sunshine and rainbows. Let’s burst the bubble now….

In my sincere opinion, Facebook also sucks.

Facebook is a new form of Xanax… It is the opium of the people. It has become this weird spin-off of reality TV, where you can now become part of the show, and expose your life to whoever you grant access to all across the world (in the meanwhile, some big guys are making bank from your online activity). You and your “friends” get to participate in this weird contest, where you get to showcase your life for the world to see.

Who has the pretties profile picture, you may ask yourself? So you change your picture every other week in order to keep up with your most up-to-date self. You have to perfectly fill out the About me, Quotes, Favorite Books/Movies/Music in order to portray the most appropriate “you”. Which are you going for? The I don’t-care-what-you-think-because-I-am-amazing-but-I-still-accept-you-as-a-friend-in-order-to-get-to-4,500-friendship-requests? Or the, I-don’t-give-a-crap-what-you-think, I-like-PBR-and-awkward-mustaches-and-pictures-of-odd-objects-but-I-still-want-you-to-“like”-my-Hemingway-tribute-poem-and-if-you-don’t-you-are-not-a-hip-intellectual-and-therefore-I-will-delete-you-from-my-friends-request?

Maybe you are neither of the above…but you have a friend who might be. And you yourself might just have a little of the essence from these two characters. Which is? The need for illusions to feel accepted and part of this world.

Where did she go this summer!? And most importantly, who is that with his arm around her!?

No way…. Did you see what she posted? Ohhhh No she didn’t….

I cannot believe that they find it appropriate to share those things on the internet…

Did you hear she got engaged? Oh yes, I read it on Facebook!

Ugh she looks so gross in that picture, why would you even think about putting that up.

He posted a video praising Rush Limbaugh…can you believe he is so close minded?

Both you and I know that we have been guilty of such gallant comments about human interactions on the web, and we are all guilty of the same sin: getting sucked into the Facebook vortex.

And the vortex sucks for a few reasons….

1. Facebook takes away the most valuable thing to many in our world…TIME. How many hours a day, a week, a month do we spend glued to the computer (or the phone) scrolling down the news feed, liking a post, and swooshing through the hundreds of thousands of pictures on yours and your friends profiles. Many people would agree that too many hours are spent on this computer program….way too many hours. Think about all the other things you could be doing instead. Cooking some good food, making yourself a dress, learning how to fix a car, spending time with grandma! You will already spend about 1.5 to 3 years sitting on the toilet in a lifetime…that’s enough sittin’ and shittin’ your time away, don’t you think?

2. Facebook is NOT REAL. Plain and simple. It is a tool that yes, is very useful in terms of quick and easy communication, yet it does not portray accurately, or for that fact, truthfully and honestly, a persons life. It builds “relationships” based on  carefully chosen moments that you allow your friends to see. You choose the person that you want to portray to be, in all your glamour (or not glamour if you are the hiking, happy go lucky, granola folk out there, yet still you portray a “self”) Yes, it is based on reality, but how many of those friendships do you feel are honestly real? How many of those moments where people connect to your happiness, and your road trips, parties, vacations, graduations, are truthful when the way we connect is by “liking a post” or commenting on how much fun it seemed to be. What would your relationship with them if they were physically close to you? And even more, when they are physically close to you, how REAL are you without the use of this tool? I say that the people that matter are the ones you make an honest attempt to stay connected with. The people you call and have a conversation once in a while, the people you write letters to over the holidays, the people that you text once a month even to say “Hey I’m thinking of you!”. There are other tools to communicate in a more personal way to people who are far away from you. Tools that do not make you feel lonely…which brings me to my third point.

3. Facebook will only make you feel lonelier. Even if it seems like your friend’s list is growing, there have been recent studies out there (google them) that are starting to talk about the effects of social media, like Facebook, and how it actually makes people feel more lonely….and honestly, and you might agree with me, I don’t think we even need a study to prove that. How many times have you been scrolling down your news feed on you couch at home, wishing you were somewhere else, like your friends in the pictures. How many times have you changed your picture and felt so good every time someone liked it? …and how long did that feeling last? When scrolling through Facebook, have you ever felt jealous? Have you ever felt excluded? Annoyed? Have you ever felt truly connected with all of these friends on your list? Are they really your friends? Can you trust them with a secret, or confide in them your deepest sorrows, or just cry on their shoulder? How many are truly friends? How many are just acquaintances?

4. It blocks you from being in the present. How many times have you stopped enjoying a beautiful moment so you could snap a picture and post it on Facebook? Way too many times. Way too many times do we start recording instead of being present in the moment, and when the moment is over, we don’t even feel like we experienced it because we were too focused on archiving it for the world to see. How many times do you find yourself spending a day out with your friends, check your phone because you got a text, and when you look up to see, every single one of your friends is looking down to their little screens checking on their telephones too? Disconnected from the present. All the wise folk in the world, dead and alive, always tell us, in different ways, “live in the present”. They say this for a reason, and it is heartbreaking that we are slowly pulling away from those wise words. De-volving in a futuristic society of “likes” and “posts”.

So like always….”WHAT TO DO?”

Boycott Facebook! Easy….. Only a one-step program.

Now, delete your account.

Mushpa y Mensa, aka Cara Elaine and Maria Emilia, as individuals, have been Facebook free for a year now.

In my experience, I do not feel any more or less connected to the world around me, even though other people might miss my presence in the realm of the internet. I keep in touch with the people that matter the most to me, and the ones that truly care are the ones that make the effort to keep in touch through other means. I keep in touch with family near and as far as the equator using for example this really archaic tool called, “Email”. ; ) That’s an easy one. Skype and other video calling programs are useful too and I even use Whatsapp to text.

I am by no means removed from the world of social media and communication, and I still have many critiques for many of these communication devices. I do live a reality though, and removing myself from the one I saw as the most toxic to real human relationships was a good first step. If each of us slowly detaches from this monster of a vortex, then I think that we can focus not only on truthful and real relationships, but furthermore, on living these relationships in the present as well…and hey, you might even find yourself with time to knit your grandma a sweater! : )

—————–

The Mushpa y Mensa Reality

Mushpa y Mensa is a small crafty arts business. We are still little, yet we are blooming. We will become successful because we believe in our magic and our beauty.

Many times we have been tempted to open a Facebook account, or for that matter an Instagram account (which is owned by the same people and is basically FB without words). It seems to be the easiest way for people to connect with us, to “Find us on Facebook” and “Like” our page. Every successful business model you see out there has the same logo-icons at the bottom of their page…Facebook, Instagram, Twitter…and the same resounding message: With these tools, people will connect with you, and without these tools, your success is questionable.

We say **** that! We will not give in. We believe in what we believe, and sticking to it might make things challenging, it might make future projects difficult to work with, it might make us stretch our resources thin, BUT it will push us to be more creative in how we connect to people in this world. It will force us to truly connect to the people who enjoy supporting our work. It will make us create a beautiful website instead of a generic Facebook page. It will be jumping with our eyes closed and landing where we should land.

As the wise Mushpa said to me the other day….

“We Want You to Love Us, Not Like Us.”

And that, my friends, is the truth.

Until my next essay,

With love,

Mensa